freshman playing varsity

[daddc]

I have a daughter who will be a freshman next year and has been informed that she will play varsity. We as parents have heard that this will most likely cause some issues with parents of older girls and other players themselves when playing time is affected for the older girls. In fact, it has somewhat already started towards our daughter. Any advice on how to handle this situation?
A dad that is worried about what is to come.

[csa]

My daughter played varsity as a freshman, and ended up a starter after the first couple of games. I think that the biggest issue was on the part of one parent (rather than her daughter) re: playing time. (I actually passed this mom "going off" on the coach in a public place about "that freshman" taking playing time from her daughter.)

If the coach decides your daughter is worthy of being on the varsity, and deserves playing time, that is his (or her) choice. There's nothing your daughter can do about others' reactions to this. She needs to work hard so that it is clear she is earning her spot and her playing time; she need to do what the coach asks of her, and be supportive of her teammates; and I think a little humility (in a good way!) will go a long way with the other players - by that I mean her acknowledging that they've been there, and that she has a lot to learn. She may have to develop a thick skin, but that's life!

My daughter is a senior this year, and she remembers her experience - she is aware of being welcoming and inclusive of young players joining the varsity.

[hardym]

My child not only is a Fr. but her mother is the coach. We have had talks about this for some time. We knew this day would come, my wife have been told that she should put her on JV and bring her up later. From a coaching stand point my child is one of the better players and should start. I told her to start and play the best players. She will have to handle the issues that may come as best and fair as she can. But the best players should play. So if your child is one of the better players she should play. I don't feel there should be a JV try-out or team until the varsity team is completed. You don't try out for JV you are placed there for development and game exposure. So when the time comes for a player to move up they are some what game tested. Good luck this season an tell your child to tryout an take a starting position if possible, it will make the team better. As for us I told my child to go out and do the same.

[TEAM-MOM]

Your daughter earned her spot. She should play her game. My daughter played varsity as a freshman and there were many comments by other girls. They girls changed their tune when two things happened (1) they challeged her to a few games one on one and lost; and (2) she helped lead the team to the playoffs. DAD, she'll be fine. Just tell her to work hard.

[AnonymousMom]

DaddC,

Please review the situation. Please make sure that the coach has your daughter's best interest. ie: is he a teaching coach,are the girls who are upset the star players or those players who were already on the bench and are not playing, because if the players who are on the bench are not being either given a chance or do not have the skills ( then they should not be on the bench anyway), if the existing players are not being developed what can that coach do for your daughter? Players usually respect talent. When the coach has the players' respect, normally they don't question his judgement and your daughter will not have a problem.

Bottom line review the situation, do the players have a legimate gripe or are they just whiners? How do the other players react to the coach? How long has the coach had the current girls? Do they appear to have grown while he has had them? Then it comes down to how comfortable is your daughter with the current situation. Ask her if she can handle what she is going to have to endure.

I know how hard this will be. I am thinking of removing daughter from what I feel is an excellent school because of the way her basketball coach kills her confidence and tries to lower her self esteem. His treatment of her is ruining her entire high school experience. Don't let that happen to your child.

[daddc]

Excellent advice. We have heard from other parents like yourselves that have been through this and it did not sound pretty at all.

[daReporta]

My daughter played varsity since 7th grade. There were some girls that quit the team because my daughter got more playing time then they did. Some parents would complain after games about playing time and coaching decisions.

When she was a soph, there was an 8th grader that made the Varsity team - my daughter took her under her wing and helped her aclimate to the older girls.

You cannot give into "she said this, she said that", because there will be a few that are jealous - I think the parents are more of a catalyst of the jealousy than the girls were. You must encourage her to play hard all the time, remind her of the benefits of playing at that level, and you cannot rescue her from the scrutiny that she will be placed under (support her).

As she grows older and establishes recognition - her skills will do the talking and she will earn respect. ;)

[oneonone]

You also have coaches who dont play thier freshmen due to giving thier seniors a chance
there was one school in henry county ga who had good freshmen who where clearly better than her seniors and didnt play her freshmen So if your child is a freshmen and is a baller dont worry about them taking a upper classmens spot a baller is a baller no matter what class they are in.

[Russ]

The worse thing for a parent/coach to hear is that they are showing favortism. Since my child was 10 I have been her coach in the parks, during her JV years in school and during the summers. She is now 14.

I will share a story from this summer: One of my better players from the older team came up and said your daughter got "nice" how come she is not playing with the 18 under team?

I said "If I do that, some would say I am showing favortism."
The Player yelled out Yo, Girls' do y'all think M----- should be playing with us or the younger girls?

It was overwhelming. She had arrived! Her talent had passed her age group.

But, for every parent/coach the decision is not as easy as mine. Some want their kid to play, and they put them in the game -just to get them in the game though there are better players on the bench would should play first. Not good.


I MADE MYSELF A PROMISE WHEN I BECAME HER COACH. And all parents who coaches a member of their family should do the same.

Repeat after me

I will never put my child or kin on the team or play my child or kin just because they are my child or kin and I am the coach. If you do athat and your child's ability is not at that level of the player sub for or who is not playing will notice. The result could be resentment in the ranks.

[harris_destiney@yahoo.com]

wow that shocking

[KickinAsphalt]

When my daughter was a freshman, there were definitely two separate opinions (by onlookers) if she should be on JV or on Varsity. She had the skillset to play on varsity, but perhaps not the confidence to play with girls so much older and established on the team. She liked how she could dominate in the Summer JV games, that's always fun - yet she also liked the challenge of playing in the tougher varsity games.

She was placed on the varsity team and subsequently started every game. It worked out fine. She quietly went out there and did her thing. There probably was some initial resentment from parents or players, but I never heard it. Because she didn't have a lot of confidence, the older girls seemed to support her and watch out for her.

I think it helped her in the long run to be a freshman on Varsity. All situations are different and the social aspects of a girls' team play a big part. It worked out for my daughter, but I can see how in other circumstances it may have been better if a player does the first year on JV to see what High School basketball is all about.

There are pros and cons. No situation is unique. Where does your daughter want to play?

[daddc]

We have talked and her goal is to play varsity as a freshman. However, she feels there will be resentment from her current teammates for her leaving that team to play varsity and fears resentment from older girls if she plays "up" and takes their spot. She got a taste of it this summer playing with the varsity team in workouts and scrimmages as an 8th grader. One of the varsity players really enjoyed playing with my daughter and told us as much. Other girls simply ignored my daughter off the court and even others ignored her on the court by not passing to her. I do understand that she is going to have to work through some of the team dynamics and some things will just have to get worked out for themselves. She does play for a very good AAU team and she has told me that if it is bad in high school ball, she will just quit and play AAU and my jaw dropped. I as a father would like to be proactive and prevent her from having that king of an experience in sports.

[dtrain34]

I am following this thread with great interest as my daughter is an 8th grader who has been participating, one way or another, with her high school-to-be since 5th grade. Recently she played varsity fall league and there was no resentment at all. It may help that the two stars of the team are seniors who won't ever play with her on the actual high school team and that a lot of the girls she will (likely) join next season on varsity played on an AAU team with her for years and are looking forward to her being there. But, I'm sure you never know until you get into the situation.

One more comment on a subject raised in the last post: It's very sad that kids are beginning to view AAU as equal to or better than their high school teams. It can be true that a kid will play on an AAU team that would soundly defeat her high school team if they ever played. However, that's not the whole experience, not even for players whose only concern is developing into a college player. All but a handful of AAU games are played before gatherings of a few dozen people; high school games usually draw much larger, more boisterous crowds. Bands are playing, rivalries are brewing. Much more like a college game than any AAU tournament. Coaches are apt to want to see how girls play both against stellar AAU competition and in the limelight of high school ball.

[kirbiclark]

ok it is way different and at 1 st i was very nervous but at the same time im excited and i can tell how the way some of the jv girls and one or two varsity say little things 2 be funny like they are mad or jelous but everyone is excited and happy and hope that i can contribute 2 the team but if your daughter starts parents and her teammates the person spot she took they will b upset but after a while they will just be happy that shes helping the team

[juslearnin]

My daughter is playing varsity as a freshman, and after having played a couple of games, I wish she would have played on the freshman team. :( The coach convinced her that being on the varsity team was an honor, so she wanted to be on varsity. My daughter gets to play, which was one of my concerns, but emotionally, I think it may have been better for her to stay with her peers. It is her peers that are cheering for her from the bleachers, and it is her peers that she hangs out with before and after games, so I think she would have been happier being a "star" on the freshman team with her friends. Developmentally, she is gaining experience and improving her game by playing with the varsity girls, but feeling apart of the team and building friendships is probably more important.

[allhoops]

Dear Regret....it sounds like she can get through this season... and the next 3 should be dynamite!....she is playing with the best comp at the school and her friends are at the games.....doesn't sound too bad.

[da silent 1]

as with any situation where young people growing up are involved there is no clear cut, do this, this way. playing on varsity as a frosh is one that has many, many scenerios. each one different for each case.
- they need players on varsity
- you clearly have the skill set
- playing jv will not help you get better
- practice with varsity is more instructive than playing j.v.
- you on varsity and practice but play jv
- politics good and bad.
as a player exactly why are you on the team? what is there for your skill set and what is there for making the varsity better. is this a future move or a present need. do you start, are you coming off the bench or are you a high level practice player. what ever the case and whatever the treatment from the coach and your peers on varsity and jv, how does it flow for you? is it worth it at all? am i a team player willing to put up with the angst for the team? these are all issues to be considered and often times are not available prior to the decision making process. and in some case may be disquised and hidden from you. the real effect does not take place until you have made a decision.
whatever that decision is, remember once in hs and beyond and for the rest of your ball career you will be competing against older players. as a frosh you may be playing against and with a player (senior) 7 months from being a collegiate player. age group means very little after 8th grade.
having coached at an elite national hs team, a select spring/summer team, semi pro, i have been a part of age/classification petty jealousness, politics etc. every player will react and perform differently. regardless it is a growing and learning process about how to fit in on a team of any type. you have to find your place, you have to adjust and often times the adjustment is on the fly. as a parent you 'know' your child/player and what they might/should/must/ be able to handle. i would suggest that 80% of the time the player will work through the good of the experience and will grow stronger because of it. as parents we all want to provide what is best, get the best source info and make a decision in the best interest of our child. but as usual, there is no book detailing the correct avenue to traverse in order to get the results that are best. 9th grader varsity or jv all boils down to your individual situation, analysis of exactly what it is, and how you 'think/believe your child will do. at the end of the day if it ain't fun no more, it is time to look at alternatives. hs basketball is an extra-curricula activity and is not a requirement. aau/spring-summer ball you pay for and have a little more control over. at best hs ball is in general not a real true gage of talent or competiveness since most leagues are not loaded with blazer teams. spring and summer ball scheduling puts you up and against good teams in general and the competition is there whether aau in route to the nationals or elite circuit competition. what is it you are really looking for when you are planning your childs basketball career? make a plan, adjust your plan and always, always have an alternative based on existing circumstance i.e. no high school and top competition spring and summer. i know this is not a difinitive answer, i just tried to put some of the considerations out there that go into your individual decision making process in the world of bringing up baby, where the answer aint in no book and what susie next door did, doesn't exactly fit for me and mine:D

[bigskyhoops]

It can be a very touchy situation if the coach cannot handle the pressure of playing a freshman over upper classman. It all boils down to playing time. If a coach isnt giving the freshman enough playing time then that player should be playing a couple quarters of JV in addition to varsity. This situation happened to my daughter last year. Our varsity coach was afraid to play freshman over upper classman irreguardless of their ability. She got a couple of quarters of JV in addition to varsity time and it helped save her season. A good coach will play the best players irreguardless of there class, a poor coach will not. Good luck and hopefully you have a opened minded coach that will take advantage of a players skill irreguardless of there class..

[janinelpn2]

My daughter played on the varsity team as a freshman and was a starter. At first there were a couple of parents that were not too happy about the idea. People who knew of my daughter were excited about her being on the varsity team because of her skill level and what she would bring to the team. After a couple of games she had proven to the fans and parents why she deserved to not only play varsity, but be in the starting five. She helped to lead her team to a 30-4 record and was named All-District & All-Region Tournament Team & All-Region MVP. This year she is joined by a freshman that will play on the varsity team and is very likely to be a starter with heavy minutes. Her coach has the philosophy that it doesn't matter what your classification is, you must earn your right to play. If that means that a junior remains on the jv team and a more skilled underclassmen is given the nod for varsity, then she needs to put in the extra time to improve her game and show the coach why she deserves that spot or playing time. The overall scheme of things should be what is best for the team and not for one individual player (parent):o